How do you know if your partner is ‘the one’?
If you are reading this, chances are you are in a relationship and want answers.
Well, you can ask your partner what they think, right?
Or… you feel very strong about someone you are dating or not dating (yet). You are not sure if they feel the same, so you are looking for answers elsewhere, like here. Hey, it happens; we have all been there. The Internet is sort of your best friend that way. You can tell it anything and hopefully nobody will look at your search history.
Just Kidding! Calm down…I am just messing with you…
Okay, I digress.
Everyone (yeah, even the people out there whom deny this) wants to find their ‘true love’. Sometimes they find it (very rarely), or sometimes they give up and just settle for the next best thing because they gave up looking. Whichever one you are, you want to make sure, right? (Right!)
So, here are a few tips to know if they are ‘the one’; your soul mate; your ‘other half’. Whatever…
1. You feel you have met them before.
You MIGHT have met them before, but if you are 100% you haven’t but you are sure you have because it feels like deja vu, then chances are you guys have known each other in a past life (yes, I believe in that stuff, so leave your judgments at the door).
In a sense, you feel very comfortable with them, conversations flow easily and it seems you never get bored with each other. When you are around them, the World feels better and your problems seem less stressful, or not at all! Talk about seeing through rose-colored glasses!
2. Both of you feel like old friends instantly.
Or you just feel like you’re already in a relationship. Being together feels so natural because you both are so at ease and comfortable. Now, the first two on this list can also be that you guys are just very comfortable with each other, but no romantic attachment is there. So, the third one is a big one when it comes to differentiating between a close friend and a life partner…
3. You just can’t see yourself living without them
This one can be really scary, especially with commitment-phobes out there. But even with the most non committed person who walks the Earth, they will freak out and run away. But through mid marathon, they will stop and ask themselves: ‘what the heck am I doing? I just ran away from the one thing I have always wanted but never thought could happen!’ Yes, it happens, folks. Sometimes even meeting the person you are meant to be with is filled with such certainty that it can freak some people out. Especially those who are used to living their lives in uncertainty. That kind of makes them feel off-balance. Like when you first step off the cruise ship after being at sea for a long time. The feeling of steadiness is almost too steady for some people. With that said make sure you consider the next one…
4. Love stories are rarely ever like in the movies
Lets be real, we all know this. Fairy tales and romantic comedies can be a little misleading because they use Hollywood time and not real time. Meaning they cram hours and days within a few minutes, so that the movie can stay interesting and not drag on. In real life, things can be really slow to manifest. And people need time. I am not saying that is the case for everyone, where you meet the one for you and they are going to keep you waiting years to ask you to marry them. And I am not saying that the ones who don’t keep you waiting are the ones for you. You will feel in your heart who truly is the one for you and the ones whom are with you but you feel yourself being insecure about their true feelings toward you. If there are insecurities and you feel they cannot be fixed by communicating, then maybe reconsider the depth of your connection to your partner. All you have to do is really consider the next point below…
5. What does your heart and your gut tell you?
Be real with your feelings if you want your partner to be real with theirs.
There is nothing more unsettling than noticing or at least sensing your love runs deeper than theirs does and vice verse. Nobody wants to be in a dead-end relationship. So, why lie to yourself and to your partner? If you really love them and you feel they really do too, tell them! And if you feel it’s the opposite and you feel one of you doesn’t love the other enough and are in the relationship for the wrong reasons, tell them! I find it so frustrating to see people in relationships who have no business being in them simply because it is for the wrong reasons, or that they are simply not mutually in love.
6. Fall in love with yourself first
Last but definitely not least, learn to love yourself and consider yourself ‘whole’ first. You do not need anybody to feel complete if you love yourself.
Most of the relationships end up unhappy or simply fall a part because either one or both of the parties involved are very insecure and feel unworthy of being loved simply because they fall short on loving themselves. You can blame your mother and father for not loving you enough; you can blame your past relationships for your scars, but learn from them. Heal yourself and then move on past it. Love yourself first. When you do that, your love becomes unconditional and you don’t need ‘the one’ to rescue you from your past traumas.
Written by: T.R. Magno
T.R. Magno is an aspiring author, mother and spiritualist. She has written short fiction. Her hobbies include writing, astrology, laughing and spending time with her loved ones.